Educating and building the next generation of American Muslims in light of the Seerah

Transcript of the Talk  Delivered by Dr. Munawar Haque on Nov 1, 2019 on Occasion of AMDA’s Third Annual Seerah Conference

One of the important aspects of the many aspects of the blessed life of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) was his role as a murabbi. Murabbi means a teacher, counselor, guide, educator, and mentor. In fact, Allah (SWT) sent Prophet Muhammad (SAW) not only as His last and final messenger, but also as the greatest murabbi or teacher to mankind.

I have been asked to share some thoughts with you on the topic: “Educating and building the next generation of American Muslims in light of the Seerah.” Understanding the Prophet’s methodology in guiding human beings is of great significance to every teacher. A comprehensive guidance involves guiding in thoughts and actions. Since the Prophet (SAW) was supported and guided by divine revelation, his methods are most effective, and using his approach is the best way to get people to respond positively.

In order to gain a following, most leaders and educators make tempting promises to their followers of things like power, wealth, position or bright future. However, the Prophet (SAW) made no such promises to his students and followers. He conquered their minds and hearts and promised them Allah’s good pleasure and paradise. He achieved permanent behavior change in people by means of the best educational methods.

An effective murabbi must possess good character. And the Prophet (SAW) is reported to have said:

إِنَّمَا بُعِثْتُ لِأُتَمِّمَ صَالِحَ الْأَخْلَاقِ

“I have only been sent to perfect good character.” Praising him, Allah (SWT) says: 

وَإِنَّكَ لَعَلى خُلُقٍ عَظِيمٍ

“And you are surely on an exalted standard of character” (al-Qalam, 68:4).

Out of all problems that surround man—moral, social, economic, political, or any other, the greatest of them is the moral problem. All other problems are only aspects of this major problem. Be it on the individual or collective level, every crime or evil is rooted in the moral problem of man. The virtues of moral conduct and good manners are seen in various sayings of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW) such as: “The most beloved of Allah’s servants to Allah are those with the best manners.” “Nothing is weightier on the Scale of Deeds than one’s good manners.”

The Prophet (saw) himself urged his followers to possess and practice good manners and abstain from the bad ones. Making peace among the people, speaking mild words, advising people to offer prayers, maintaining family ties, spreading greeting of peace among the people, feeding the hungry, treating the poor and orphans with compassion, taking care of the affairs of the Muslims and those under their protection, being moderate in eating, drinking and dressing, spending in Allah’s cause, showing  kindness to one’s spouse, being good to neighbors, guarding secrets, having politeness in speech, and honoring the guests, are some of the many forms of good manners that the Prophet (SAW) encouraged people to cultivate.

A good educator should care about his students and should be genial and positive. In fact, he should devote himself to his profession and students. The Prophet (SAW) always devoted himself to his duty as a teacher.

One of the most effective ways of teaching is demonstrating by means of practice. The Prophet (SAW) used to teach by practice. The first principle to keep in mind when introducing the practices of religion to our children is to practice what we preach. Children, especially young children, learn more by seeing than by hearing. When a parent makes an effort to pray on time, whether at work, a social gathering, or on holiday, it is far more powerful to a child then telling him or her to pray. Furthermore, our behavior within the home has a profound effect on the feelings our children have towards these practices. If they see us place a great deal of emphasis on acts of worship, but see us gossip, lose our temper, and generally lack good behavior, then they will observe our hypocrisy and conclude that the outward acts of Islam are mere rituals, without any purpose.

Raising our children in such a manner that they carry out the acts prescribed by their Creator with love and willingness is a concern for any Muslim parent, but often we don’t know where to begin. First of all we should realize that Islam is not simply a subject kids will learn at school. Islam is life. Live and embody this life proudly and graciously. This will create meanings and experiences that become inseparable from your kids’ hearts, minds, souls and identities. For example, instead of saying “Islam teaches kindness and nobility towards women”, you need to actually show kindness to your own spouse and give the example of the Prophet (SAW) who lived some of the most noble, elegant and heartwarming moments with his wives. And he said: “The best of you is the one who is best to his wife, and I am the best of you to my wives.”

It was a common practice of Prophet (SAW) to rally the Muslims in Madinah to work together to support a noble cause, to help the poor, and to donate generously. He constantly inspired his companions to develop a spirit of giving and helping, and said: “The most beloved people to Allah are those who are most beneficial to the people.”

We have to inculcate these values of doing voluntary works in our young ones through practical demonstration.

وَمَن تَطَوَّعَ خَيْرًا فَإِنَّ اللَّهَ شَاكِرٌ عَلِيمٌ

“Whoever voluntarily does good, then indeed Allah is appreciative, all-knowing.” (al-Baqarah, 2:158)

فَمَن تَطَوَّعَ خَيْرًا فَهُوَ خَيْرٌ لَّهُ

“If someone does good of his own accord, it is better for him.” (al-Baqarah, 2:184)

Volunteering includes volunteering one’s time, money, skills, and efforts to serve one’s community.

 فَاسْتَبِقُوا الْخَيْرَاتِ

“So compete with one another in doing good.” (al-Baqarah, 2:148)

We don’t have to come up with extraordinary techniques. We already have the perfect path of the Prophet (SAW) to emulate. If we ourselves are not living this life passionately, we can’t expect kids to learn it only from schools, camps or retreats. Islam is an emotional, intellectual, spiritual and physical journey that we live, and our kids need to see us leading this journey with love and passion.

Learners, especially children tend to like most the teacher or any person for that matter who is easy with them and treats them as if he is one of them. On the other hand, they are repelled from the harsh, angry and frowning person. Anas ibn Malik (RA) says: “I served the Prophet for ten years, and he never said to me, “Uf” (a minor word denoting impatience) and never blamed me saying: “Why did you do so or why didn’t you do so?” Educationalists and psychologists say that for sustainable long-term education, a stable and uncritical relationship between teacher and learner is a must. It is well said that the child and his heart are like a land with no seeds or plants. Whatever seed one casts therein, it will take root.” When you sow the seeds of goodness, you will reap goodness.

Sometimes we miss the greater objective of an Islamic education: the need to nurture our children towards becoming balanced, wholesome, and honest human beings who live lives based on principles and who exemplify good character in their dealings with other people. We have to constantly encourage good character and manners in our children.

We have to explain to our children with gentleness and wisdom that Islam teaches us that everything considered harmful to the body, mind, soul or society is prohibited, while whatever is beneficial is permissible. Thus, consuming pork, alcohol or mind-altering drugs are prohibited. Likewise, gambling, usury, fortune-telling, killing, lying, stealing, cheating, oppressing or abusing others, being greedy or stingy, engaging in sex outside of marriage, disrespecting parents, and mistreating relatives, orphans or neighbors are all prohibited and reprehensible activities because they are harmful to the individual and the society. There are numerous prophetic traditions that talk about the haram and halal in Islam.

One of the best methods of education is telling stories and giving examples as stories and examples stick more in the mind. The Prophet (SAW) used to give examples suitable to the topic. For example, he highlighted the significance of the prayer with a beautiful example. He asked: “What would you say if there were a river in front of a man’s house and he bathed in it five times a day, would he remain dirty?” Those who were there replied, “No dirt would remain on that man.” Upon this the Prophet (SAW) said, “This is how it is with the five daily prayers. Allah (SWT) cleans the sins by means of them.”

  Another way of providing information which stays permanently in the mind of the learners is to make use of drawings and figures. Once while sitting with a companion, he explained the features of the paths of Allah and Satan by drawing lines on the ground. The companion – Jabir (RA) narrated the incident as follows: When I was sitting together with the Prophet (SAW), he drew a line and said, “This is the path of Allah (SWT)”. Then he drew two lines to the right of this line and two lines to the left of the same line and said, “And these are the paths of the Satan”. Then he put his hand over the line in the middle and recited the following verse:

وَأَنَّ هَذَا صِرَاطِي مُسْتَقِيمًا فَاتَّبِعُوهُ وَلَا تَتَّبِعُوا السُّبُلَ فَتَفَرَّقَ بِكُمْ عَنْ سَبِيلِهِ ذَلِكُمْ وَصَّاكُمْ بِهِ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

“This is My straight path. Follow it, and do not follow other ways that will lead you away from His path. This is what He commands you, so that you will be mindful of Him.” (al-An’am, 6:153)

The Prophet (SAW) used to reward and appreciate positive behaviors. Therefore, if we want to lead our children to behave positively and prevent them from acting negatively, a good way to do this is to reward and appreciate positive action. To be loved and appreciated is what people crave.  In the process of learning, people conclude from the appreciation and approval of the educators what they are doing right and what they are doing wrong. Ibn Abbas (RA) tells: “One day I prepared some water in a pot so that the Prophet could perform ablution. When the Prophet saw the pot, he asked who had prepared it. Once he learned that it was me who had prepared it, he prayed for me, “O Allah! Increase his understanding in religion.”

The Prophet (SAW) would not speak in a way that would break anybody’s heart. He used a style in his speeches that affected people and made them think. When someone complained to him about someone, or he saw a fault in someone, he criticized the behavior; not the agent. He made people realize that what is wrong is the behavior. Once, a young man came to the Prophet (SAW) and said, "O Messenger of Allah! Give me permission to commit unlawful sex (zina).'' The people surrounded him and rebuked him, saying, "Stop! Stop!'' But the Prophet said, "Come close.” The young man came to him, and he said, "Sit down." So he sat down. The Prophet said, "Would you like it (i.e., the act of zina) for your mother, for your daughter, for your sister, and for your paternal or maternal aunts?" Each time the man said that he would not like that and each time the Prophet said that neither would the people like it for their mothers, daughters, sisters or aunts. Then the Prophet (SAW) put his hand on him and said, "O Allah, forgive his sin, purify his heart and guard his chastity.” After that the young man never paid attention to anything of that nature.

The Prophet (SAW) had a very special place for the youth in his heart. From the children in his family to the young people in the community, everyone experienced the warmth of his presence and love. The Prophetic approach in interacting with the youth was that of anchoring the soul to its innate nature: the fitrah. With love and empathy, the Prophet nourished the youth. He instructed them, advised them, empowered them, and developed them emotionally and spiritually, and demonstrated to the world the incredible heights that could be reached with young people marching in the front lines.

By following the Prophetic methodology, we will inshaAllah remain balanced, giving our young generation the space to be children, but letting them know that they are preparing for a meaningful and purposeful life in this world and an eternal blissful life in the hereafter.

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